


Letters to the Editor (aka the return of SPAG!Draco)

by Rickey



Series: SPAG!Draco [2]
Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Ficlet, Humor, M/M, SPAG, Satire
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2010-02-01
Updated: 2010-02-01
Packaged: 2017-10-23 14:33:13
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 448
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/251383
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Rickey/pseuds/Rickey
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Sequelette to Unsolicited Criticism: SPAG!Draco is on the warpath against annoying yellow journalists</p>
            </blockquote>





	Letters to the Editor (aka the return of SPAG!Draco)

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks to melusinahp and tailoredshirt for looking this over. Draco would be proud.

**The Daily Prophet**  
Letters to the editor

Re "Dating a Death Eater," May 19

I am thoroughly disappointed in the quality of writing in the aforementioned article. The writer (although it pains me to label Ms Prudence as such) is clearly not at the caliber one would expect for a published journalist.

The writing contains more dangling participles, misplaced modifiers, and blatant malapropisms than you can shake a wand at. Ms Prudence abuses adverbs to the point of obscenity. I counted 27 usages of words ending in 'ly' in a five-paragraph article.

Ms Prudence fails to find a focus in her article. She lists so many mundane things such as what we ate, how we took our tea, or how many Galleons my shoes cost, that I can't imagine a single reader being even remotely interested enough to finish the article. The quality and intensity of a date is far better described by the visceral reactions of the participants. Tell your readers about the steamy looks, the hands held across the table, or the foot divested of its shoe and edging up the other's calf. Far more action was happening under the table than in Ms Prudence's article. Noting that Mr Potter takes his tea with three sugars and half a cup of milk, while being repulsive, is not newsworthy, nor does it move the story forward. Stated incorrectly in the article, I would like to set the record straight that I take my tea with one sugar and a dash of milk like a proper wizard should.

I'm left to assume that your entire fact checking department must be on holiday, because Mr Potter and I have been dating for six months, not three. Additionally, my middle name is Abraxas, not Lucius. Is it so difficult to check Ministry records?

I take offence to the description that we were 'tangled up' upon exiting the restaurant. I'm nothing if not graceful. We were entwined. Word selection is paramount to the success of a story. The language should match the tone and feel of the story as well as the nature and upbringing of the cast.

Furthermore, Ms Prudence's strange usage of British English and the word 'gotten' has me wondering if she's an American, and if she is, please send her back to the States via the next Portkey.

Finally, at the conclusion of the article, Ms Prudence posts the question: 'Is Harry Potter falling in love with this former Death Eater?' Please send Ms Prudence to an Introduction to Journalism course. Even the most layman reader can observe that she buried the lead.

 _Draco Malfoy  
Wiltshire  
Mr. Malfoy is Sr. Editor, Ministry for Magic, Dept. of SPAG_


End file.
